Showing posts with label Bret Jordan. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bret Jordan. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
The Haunted Brothel Bret Jordan
Bret Jordan
ISBN 978-1-936165-60-5
Word Count: 17008
PDF Page Count: 67
Heat Index: Sweet
Does this book contain violence? No
Genre(s): Paranormal Mystery/ Comedy
Buy Link: http://purplesword.com/zencart/index.php?main_page=product_info&cPath=2&products_id=62
Can a football jock, cheerleader, stoner, techno-nerd, and lazy Bassett Hound come together and discover the mystery of The Haunted Brothel?
The Regent hotel is about to open as a ghost walk, packed with terrorizing special effects along with actors dressed as zombies, werewolves, and vampires. There's only one problem. The Regent seems to really be haunted. That's not a problem for a young group of ghost hunters. Nancy's the group's think tank and can solve mysteries in her sleep. If muscle is needed Tony is the young Adonis who's not only into heavy lifting, but also a big hit with the ladies. Tina is a paranormal investigator who is into Tony almost as much as she's into herself while their technician is a stoner with a Bassett Hound that can talk, though nobody else can hear his words. The Regent is their first assignment, and these young Paranormal Investigators will learn ghost hunting is scarier than it looks on television while they find out more about each other.
Excerpt:
Dwayne stood next to the stairs as the group climbed up and left him behind. He didn't mind. All this ghost stuff was stupid anyway. Dwayne only hung out with the group because he didn't have anything better to do, plus the van was pretty cool, two tone green with Paranormal Investigations Group painted on the side in black. It looked like a good place to smoke a little weed if he could get a moment or two by himself. Hell, a green two-tone van was made just for that purpose.
He smiled and scratched Randy behind the ears. Most dogs liked that, but Randy didn't seem to give a damn one way or the other. Lazy bastard. The dog had a lazy streak, but so did Dwayne. They had been together for two years, best of friends. Dwayne just wished everyone else could understand Randy as well as he could, though Randy didn't seem to talk much when other people were around. Dwayne figured Randy had a shyness about him. Of course sometimes Dwayne had trouble understanding the Bassett Hound, too. The dog seemed to make the most sense when Dwayne smoked a joint or two, and mushroom tea turned the animal into a blabbering idiot who not only talked incessantly, but also wore strange outfits. Dwayne couldn't ever figure where he got them from, and he only wore them when Dwayne drank mushroom tea. Maybe there was a connection. He would have to think on that.
Randy groaned as a dorky guy with a broom and bowl style haircut walked past. The fellow gave Dwayne a crooked smile, and he replied with a timid wave.
Mr. Krager called down from upstairs. The man cringed, tilted his head down to his feet and walked up the stairs and out of Dwayne's line of sight. The stairs creaked under his weight.
Dwayne scratched Randy's ears some more. “We're gonna have to find out where that guy gets his hair done and make sure never to go there.”
“Hey.”
Dwayne looked up and into the red eyes of a zombie. He screeched and tumbled backwards onto his butt. Randy groaned and squirmed as Dwayne's leg fell over the dog's back.
“Didn't mean to scare you.” The zombie giggled as it stuck its hand out to help Dwayne to his feet.
Dwayne decided that this was no ordinary zombie. First of all, the thing had boobs, not a bad trait for a rotting undead creature and something that he could certainly work with. Secondly the zombie had a pretty smile, thick lips and beautifully white teeth, not the type that one would sink into the living's neck
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
New Release : Airlocked
Airlocked
Bret Jordan
ISBN 978-1-936165-46-9
Price: 3.99
Release Date: June 2, 2010
Word Count: 24k
PDF Page Count: 70
Heat Index: Sweet
Does this book contain violence? Yes
Genre(s): Science Fiction/Romance/Horror
Search Words (at least 20): science fiction, space exploration, romance, spaceship, starship, horror, starvation, zero gravity, stranded, computer, artificial intelligence, AI, tech, space, stars, weightless, float, deep space, cryo, cryogenics, cannibalism, death, space station, alone, cannibal, abandoned, drift
Tagline: Abandoned in deep space brings some together while driving others over the edge, but that is just the beginning of their troubles…
Blurb: One hundred and fifty years in the future humans are finally reaching out to the stars. Though capable of deep space travel humanity is still an infant among the void and things can go horribly wrong in the blackness of infinity.
The crew of the Valkyrie awakens from their cryogenic sleep early - months early. The Valkyrie wasn’t made for long-term habitation, a cargo carrier engineered to be lived in for only a few hours on each side of a transport run. Now the crew is forced to learn to live together in an environment where the average room is the size of a closet and the corridors almost touch their shoulders as they pass. Two of the crewmembers are drawn together in a closeness they never thought they would find, but the other crewmember falls over the edge of sanity in the face of the cold void surrounding them. Dwight and Victoria soon realize that the tight quarters are the least of their problems…
Excerpt:
Vicky told him about her career as a medical officer. She talked about her hectic four-year training at the Armstrong medical facility on the moon. They laughed as she told him of some of her more colorful instructors and the occasional pranks the students would play on one another. Dwight perked up when she talked about Daniel Destephano, the man she almost went into a two-year marriage contract with.“Why didn’t you marry him? It’s obvious that you liked him. Did you get a high dollar contract to ship out that messed it up, or maybe it’s the commitment that you don’t care for?”
Vicky smiled and squinted her eyes. “Are you teasing me?”
False shock and indignation flooded Dwight’s face. “Moi? Never!”
She laughed. “Okay, since you weren’t teasing me, I’ll tell you. I caught him in bed with my best friend.”
He cringed. “Ouch.”
“Ouch is right. Daniel and my friend apologized over and over again, claiming that it was a momentary lapse in judgment. I didn’t care. He had hurt me and so had my best friend. He’s the reason I started taking these deep space runs after graduation. I didn’t want to be around anyone, and I figured the deep space runs were the best way to do that. It’s what I’ve been doing ever since.”
Vicky pulled her feet from the straps, grabbed Dwight’s arm, and swung herself around until she hovered in front of him. “Okay, Mr. Larson. Do you have any loves of your life that you would like to share with me?”
Oh, hell no! He thought. All of his loves had begun late in the night at a bar and ended as soon as he woke up the next morning. His relationships were nothing to brag about, at least not with her. “There’s really nothing to tell. I’ve dated, but that’s it. I guess I’ve never been in any place long enough to have a relationship.”
“That’s kind of sad.”
Yeah, tell me about it.
“If we make it through this, do you think you and I might have one?”
Dwight put his hand in hers. Their fingers interlocked and squeezed. “First off, it is when we make it through this. Secondly, the last few days with you have been the closest thing I’ve had to a relationship in years. I like it and would like to see more of it.”
She squeezed his hand and smiled then leaned forward and gave him a coy kiss on the lips. Their lips touched for only a second, but the feeling lingered. It was a good feeling. It touched him inside with an emotion that he hadn’t felt in years if ever. He released her hand and slipped his arm around her waist. His head tilted forward. Her eyes closed and her lips parted slightly.
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